Three months after former St. Louis Park baseball star Derrick Keller died due to complications from leukemia, the Keller family said they are still grieving but believe DK is here in spirit.
The following was posted on Keller's CaringBridge page Wednesday night:
Today is 3 months since Derrick passed. Linda and I have learned a few things during this time. We have learned that there is nothing worse a human can have happen to them than losing your child. We have learned that there are times when you get mad at the world, and times you really get mad at God. We have learned that when your child dies, all your hopes and dreams die with him. This is where we are at after 3 months. Every single day I think about how unfair this was. I cry when I realize that DK is never coming home.
What would he have grown up to be? Would he have married and had kids? How many kids? What kind of girl would he of married? These are questions we will never have answers to. I think of how we will never go to a ball game again. This is the time when we get angry. I could never explain how much this sucks!!
I heard from a mom who lost her child to a car accident 15 years ago. She said the pain never goes away, but it does get managable.
The only thing that has gotten me through this alive is that I do believe Derrick is with Jesus in heaven, living in utopia. Last week a guy I work with asked me first thing in the morning if I knew someone was watching me the day before. I asked him, "Who was watching me?" He said there was a butterfly flying around my area. He said it flew around my head about 4 times, then just took off.
Every day I pray that I will get a sign that Derrick is in heaven and doing real well. My first thought was maybe this is the sign. I determined that it couldn't be because I didn't see it. So for the rest of the day I prayed to see the butterfly and that will be my sign. I looked all day but I never saw the butterfly. When I got home, Linda had put the Sun Sailor (St. Louis Park newspaper) on my chair like she always does. She always takes the plastic wrapper off and sets the paper on my chair. She says she takes the plastic off so it doesn't end up on the floor. I picked up the paper and started crying. On the front page of the paper was a huge picture of a butterfly. When I told this story to Linda, she cried too. Thanks for the sign DK.